RESIDENTS of Bournemouth were in shock this morning, as the town seemed to have made a miraculous transformation overnight.
Amazed people could be seen on the streets from the early hours of the morning wondering just where everything was. One of those, Tom Roberts, told us that he had not seen who had caused this:"I have no idea how this even happened. I presume I must have been asleep, or something. But when I got up this morning and went out, there were no aeroplanes and no tourists. Something weird must be going on. It's like we've gone into an alternate dimension. I didn't even have to put my middle finger up at people in the wrong lane at the Cooper Dean."
Frightened townsfolk also pointed to the transport around town to further demonstrate the worrying changes. A Charminster resident told us that she'd been able to actually sit down on the bus to work, and one man from the town centre recounted how his journey to work was similarly unusual: "I didn't have to hit anyone standing by a suitcase to get onto my train this morning, and when I got on it, I could actually put my bag on the seat instead of the train being so overcrowded that I have to use the overhead racks."
All over the town, reports came in of the scale of the transformation. A shop worker in the town centre reported her entire clientèle being pensioners and the occasional businessman, instead of the more usual under-dressed parents with kids running wild: "I can actually work, rather than mind other people's kids. And that is not right," she said.
"Also, it's sunny outside. Look at that and tell me something weird hasn't happened."
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